Just to prove to you how busy I have been, here's what I've been up to for the past three months.
- Sacrificing my social life and not going out to bars. I tell people it's because I need to save money. The real reason? Skyrim, obviously.
- Took a trip home to North Carolina! It was good to see people from NC. There are tons of friends that I miss - boys who look like girls and girls with bigger dicks than most guys I know. Although, honestly, it was hard being away from Skyrim. So hard, I convinced my little brother to get his Xbox 360 fixed and bought him Skyrim for it...and didn't let him play it.
- Working. But only to afford my expensive video game and comics addiction.
- Trying really hard to not get laid. I know what you're thinking and I will say it for you. The guys are all over me. And for the most part this is true. It's been a really great work out throwing them all off of me. I'm too cheap to afford a gym membership so this is the only kind of work out I can get. If I had to choose between toned arms and good, meaningless sex...I'm gonna go with a bag of chips.
- Making a complete fool out of myself. Not only have I made countless rape and domestic abuse jokes at work only to see horror in the face of my co-workers, I just recently accidentally attempted to steal $40 worth of comics from my LCS (Local Comic Shop...get with it). I also tell new guys I meet that I hate gay people which somehow isn't working in my favor.
As you can see, a lot has happened. And 90% of what has happened, has done so in a fictional world called Skyrim. I'm pretty much done with it (for now) and have shifted my attention elsewhere. I have reignited my love for comics and am balls deep into this affair. I'm going to try and do a weekly round-up of comic reviews and recommendations.
I will leave you with this funny anecdote about my attempt to get into The Mercury (a members only goth/industrial club here in Seattle).
The Scene: The Mercury. The Crime: Blue denim.
It seemed innocent enough. I was meeting up with my friends Ryan and Kamil at the Unicorn. It was Friday and I needed to have some drinks with the gurlz, as one does. I am dressed in just some normal jeans and a black button down and my leather jacket. But then - a crisis started to brew.
My friend and co-worker, Shaun, texted me and asked if I wanted to meet him at the Mercury. Fortunately, he is a member there a I had been wanting to check it out for quite some time. I was like "FUCK YEAH BRO." There was only one problem - a very strict dress code. I was like oh well these jeans are dark and everything else is black - I should be fine. I was anything but.
The second we get in the door, the door man (I'M NOT APOLOGIZING TO A DOOR MAN. HE'S A DOOR MAN*) shines a flashlight on my jeans and gives me that smug "I-can't-believe-you're-wearing-blue-denim" face. He tells me I won't be able to come in. But then, his face lights up. I quote, verbatim: "I'm not saying this as the doorman but as a member. You can totally take your pants off and check them at the coat check. And no one should give you shit and if they do, you can send them to me. If not, the Crypt might still be open." There are really no words to explain how I felt. Not only am I not going to go buy a pair of pants to go into a club I'm already at, but my legs are whiter than my jeans ever will be. Shaun suggested I just take my button down off and tie it around my waist after removing my pants. I'm almost drunk enough to do it but instead, we head to Grimm's and then to Amante's where I eat my feelings to ensure that I will never want to take my pants off in public.
*Cheers to anyone who got my Bridezillas reference
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